Well, it has been a crazy month, and tomorrow is the start of the –BER months. Here in our country, most people will start the Christmas Day countdown. so we are all trying to be good girls and boys until Santa comes. LOL!
Hopefully we’ll be able to move into our new home. I pray to God that this is it. I don’t want to hear my mother’s sermon everyday and have long bus ride to and from work. I miss to play with my daughter, I miss to cook her favorite meals, I miss her.
When we move, i know it will feel like that we’re in a limbo. I don’t know what our status is but I’m sure I’m happy and scared. Next week is my hubby’s and daughter’s birthday. We have many things in our plate, but I think God is teaching us to appreciate the little things. I feel awkward having a birthday party because my friends and family have different opinions in what’s happening to our relationship. Me too. haha! But our focus now is just to move and make the day after day a ritual again for our daughter.
I told a friend that I once scolded my daughter ’cause she keeps on following me even in the bathroom. We have the same conclusion: I am the only stable thing in her life and she as a person has an instinct to hold it close to her. I was scolded by my mother why I keep giving my daughter anything she likes. I didn’t answer back because I’m so tired. The reason is that we owe it to her for now. I mean, she’s a child who is in the middle of a family crisis. to tell you honestly, our family has a huge factor on our life. i’m disappointed at them as I am with me. Anyways, this is not about that.
I was scanning my email when I found a sent item for a newspaper. When i was young it was my dream to publish an article in a newspaper or in a magazine. I just don’t have the courage to do so. I did it once and damn, it’s about love. hahaha!
I’ll think about posting it here but i’m a bit embarrassed. hahaha!
Maybe I just feel excited, tired and worried.
I’m a drop of water in God’s river and He’s the one directing the path.